The relationship that exists between a mother and her daughter is a special one. Between the two is a bridge from one generation to the other. A mother is supposed to transition her values, visions and dreams to her daughter in such a smooth and great way that the daughter would not in anyway be in doubt as to where she should be heading. Standing on the shoulders of mothers, daughters can accomplish amazing things.
In traditional parlance, mothers are commonly known to teach their daughters domestic chores, how to be a proper females and fit into the traditions of the ethnic or tribal group they come from; other issues are about how to be a good wife and the preparations thereof. Beyond all these, it should not be lost on us that mothers are supposed to prepare their daughters for life and this cuts across spiritual growth and maturity, emotional lifestyle that is balanced enough to enable the daughters know how to stay stable in an emotionally unbalanced world; economic empowerment values that makes the daughter self-reliant and virtuous in the management of personal and family economy before she steps into the shoes of running a family of her own. The role of the mother is indeed herculean and challenging as it is interesting.
The passing of sound values from mother to daughter cannot be a possibility except there is a bond of friendship. This is lacking in today’s relationship between the two. Most mothers were abused and had difficult childhood. They came away with that orientation and unconsciously want to pass this anger over and against their daughters even though what they experienced from their own mothers was not the best. And they colour it with appellations of “I love my daughter; that’s why I discipline her”. No, it is abuse not to be friends with your daughter as a mother. You cannot mentor her effectively with a hateful attitude.
My mother was the best friend I had while growing up. You may say I was fortunate or lucky. I would say I was blessed. If you didn’t get that kind of upbringing, you must cultivate and learn it. My mother was my role model and this is the reason why I became a passionate fashion icon. She inspired me to become what I have become. I learnt it from her because she did her job with a passion and carried me along. She told me every thing I needed to know. She was a prayerful woman and she taught me the values of prayers. She had a wonderful relationship with my dad and that inspired the wonderful marriage I now enjoy with my husband of almost 20 years. She taught me how to be self-reliant; now I am an entrepreneur.
My daughter is my friend par excellence. I have developed an uncommon friendship with her and we love each other with a passion. She tells me everything and I mean everything. We play like friends and she has found in me a role model. What my mother taught me which I practiced, I am teaching my daughter and she is running with the vision. I saw her took interest in singing from age 2 because I took her to my choir rehearsals. Today, she almost sings better than I do. We have a bond that is absolutely unbreakable.
What are you teaching your daughters? Mothers, it is high time we took our daughters back from the hands of the enemy. We had left them too long on their own and they are missing their ways. Many ladies today “hate” their mothers because they never learnt how to be real ladies from the one who should tutor them. The daughters today are the mothers of tomorrow. God is calling our attention to be repairers of the breach. Let us undo the errors of our past and restore the mother-daughter relationship that once gave birth to a possibility generation. Our societies and nations’ future will be secured with inspiring mothers and fired-up daughters.